You and your partner have recently welcomed a child. You couldn’t be happier to meet your new addition—but unfortunately, your partner’s birth experience was quite traumatic. Right now, you’re balancing parenting with caring for your partner’s needs. You care deeply about your partner, and you know that her birth experience was much more difficult than she could’ve imagined.
Your partner might still be in physical pain, and she’s emotionally shaken. You want to do everything in your power to help her recover. What should you prioritize? Here are a few ways to help your partner heal after a traumatic birth.
Care For Your Partner’s Physical Needs
First, it’s important to ensure that your partner is getting enough to eat and drink, as well as following any treatments that her doctor has prescribed. If the doctor has recommended that she restrict certain activities until a specific date, gently encourage her to heed the doctor’s advice. This likely means you will have to do extra housework, so keeping a to-do list and tidying up regularly are smart choices. Additionally, if you have wiggle room in your budget, you could invest in convenient services like grocery delivery.
Set Strict Boundaries Around Visitors
It’s only natural that people will want to meet your new baby—but right now, your partner might not be up for receiving any visitors. It’s up to you to set boundaries around who can visit and for how long. Check in with your partner to see if there is anyone she would explicitly like to visit, such as her parents, your parents, or any siblings. Beyond that, you’ll need to let people know that they will have to wait if they want to visit.
Go Above And Beyond On Childcare
Perhaps you and your partner had discussed how you would split up certain childcare tasks once the baby arrived. But now that your partner needs extra downtime to recover from her traumatic birth experience, these plans might have gone out the window. You may have to handle the majority of childcare tasks aside from breastfeeding. If you need advice, reach out to your loved ones for guidance.
Advocate For Your Partner
After giving birth, your partner will later have a checkup with their doctor. You might need to serve as an advocate for your partner in medical settings. Sometimes, women’s pain and discomfort are dismissed by doctors, so if your partner is still struggling, make sure to speak up on her behalf. Pay close attention during any appointments.
Consider Reaching Out To A Therapist
Your partner might be struggling emotionally in a way that physical treatments will not help. If your partner is dealing with anxiety, depression, symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder, or any other mental health condition, talk to them about connecting with a therapist. There are therapists who specialize in helping postpartum mothers. If your partner is not ready to leave the house yet, they might be interested in trying virtual therapy.
Pamper Your Partner
Finally, don’t forget to pamper your partner. You don’t have to go out of your way with expensive, grand gestures, but think about how you could brighten her day. In the midst of the chaos that comes with the newborn days, there is still room for surprises. You may want to plan something special for the future when she’s physically feeling better, like a spa day.
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Are you trying to find a way to support your partner after birth trauma? Working with a therapist can help. Reach out to us to discuss your options for scheduling a session for trauma therapy.
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